Prelude: I have a lot of writing to catch up on (my goal is one post a week). My last post put too much pressure on me to draft a magnum opus on "the development of the novel form", which lead to a five week haitus. I've learned my lesson, I hope. I’m going to write shorter, focused posts to build momentum.
As a book lover, its impossible for me to not click on anyone's "top 10" book lists. Perhaps you might enjoy seeing mine.
There is a difference between my top 10 books and the best 10 books. There are "better" or more technically proficient writings out there. However, these books have had the greatest impact on my life, and for that they are my designated as "top".
My ranking of my top 7 books of all time:
The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls - I've read this memoir seven times from high school through my twenties. It describes the childhood of an author with a father who gambles their money away, a mother who enacts no rules, and two siblings who together persist through moving, violence, and uncertainty. She shares a special relationship with her father, a failed dreamer. I have similar relationship with my father. This book is "my first literature love".
“We had some times, didn't we?'
'We did.'
'Never did build that Glass Castle.'
'No. But we had fun planning it.” - Jeannette Walls talking with her DadThe Death of Ivan Llynch by Leo Tolstoy - I read this novella in my mid-twenties because my dad kept recommending Tolstoy to me. This short read captures the concerns of a successful lawyer in his final moments. It made me contemplate what I wanted, and then convinced me that pursuing my unique interests would lead to a life of least regret. This lead to quitting my engineering job at 27 years old to sell beauty products.
“Can it be that I have not lived as one ought?" suddenly came into his head. "But how not so, when I've done everything as it should be done?”
Night Train to Lisbone by Pascal Mercier - This book is philosophy disguised as fiction. It's not the most well written (being quite preachy), but it played the role of "advice from an older friend" when I was craving it. It helped me consider things like regret, friendship, loneliness, silence, etc.
"Disappointment is considered bad. A thoughtless prejudice. How, if not through disappointment, should we discover what we have expected and hoped for? And where, if not in this discovery, should self-knowledge lie?"
Ecclesiastes (in the Bible) - I read this book over and over again in my twenties. Ecclesiastes is considered one of the biblical books of wisdom (alongside Proverbs, Psalms, and Song of Soloman), and I was seeking wisdom. In a way, its teachings took the wind out of my sails—or, more positively, gave my ambitions a healthy dose of humility.
"Then I considered all that my hands had done... and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun."
Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill - I read this book the year I graduated UCLA. It shaped my approach at goal setting— I realized that defining, setting, executing, and iterating goals was a deliberate process. I've tried not to stray far from it since.
"The starting point of all achievement is DESIRE. Keep this constantly in mind. Weak desire brings weak results, just as a small fire makes a small amount of heat."
How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie - I am not naturally a very socially saavy person. I had become a matter-of-fact, emotion-gated engineer who hadn't let herself completely understand the word empathy. This book helped me realize that genuinely caring what someone had to say was the answer to developing connections. It was so mind-altering that I attest there was a Sandra before she read this book, and a Sandra after she read this book.
"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you."
Born of This Land: My Story by Chung Ju Yung - This is the memoir of the South Korean entrepreneur who found Hyundai, a multi-conglomerate construction, automobile, and ship-making company. I read it at MIT in graduate school last year, at 29. Throughout this book is Mr. Yung's sense of purpose beyond himself— first helping his family, then helping transform his country, which at the time was poor and underdeveloped. I've been seeking a similar sense of duty in my entrepreneurial life ever since.
"Thinking that anything is possible is the first rule of a successful person. If you doubt yourself, then you will only be able to accomplish as much as your doubts let you. If you think you can’t do something then you won’t be able to do it."
Well, there it is!
I read most of the books on this list before I was 24.
Did these books change me because I read them during a time when people are most open to change—those early to mid-twenties?
As I go into my thirties, I hope I continue to read books that change me. Just as importantly, I hope I remain someone who can be changed.
If, in ten years, I have a new set of life-changing books, I’d be satisfied.
Honorable Mentions:
Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle - This self help book is a reflection on "being present" — tacky right? I didn't expect it to be too much of a hit either. But Eckhart, a German "pop philosopher" (famously friends with Oprah), ended up doing a life-changing job at showing what being present feels like. I found myself doing nothing but "being"— purely existing, looking, and observing. It changed my understanding of reality.
100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez - A book that changed how I see family and gender dynamics. It captures the roles—and pressures—of being a father, mother, grandfather, grandmother, daughter, and son. This work traces the lives of one family from rural Colombia across seven generations. It's a captivating angle.
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas - I think this is the best novel of all time. It is the ultimate banger of a plot and character development. Dumas plays with your emotions (revenge, love, desperation, hope, solitude) and leaves you astounded.